Wednesday, March 22, 2006

I Need a Hero

Today at lunch the Pamphlets met at Taco Bell to share a meal. I am one of those people who frequently custom-orders fast food, not because I'm uberpicky or anything, but for the simple reason that uncooked onions are gross and leave a terrible burpy aftertaste. So my burrito supreme is always ordered without onions. Only today it wasn't made correctly, and the onions were STILL THERE. Yuck! What to do? I really don't want to eat the onion burrito. I have an afternoon meeting in which I'll speak a lot in a small room. Onion breath is not a healthy part of that equation. It will definitely have to be returned to the counter and traded for a properly onionless version. This, I firmly believe, is best handled by Blue, for very good reasons.
Blue Takes It Back vs Pink Takes It Back

When a man takes an item back, it's because it's the restaurant's mistake. When a woman takes it back, she is bitchy and finicky.

Blue can shift attention from himself and thus feel no pressure. "My wife's burrito has onions. She wants a new one." If I go up there, it's all about me. "I really wanted one without onions. It's on the receipt... Can I have a new one.... please?"

It's romantically old-fashioned and even chivalrous for Blue to fix the burrito problem for me and swoop in on a white horse with a non-smelly burrito. It is icky and confrontational for me to go up there and complain about my food if the problem is not really a health or safety issue, but rather based only on my wants.


It takes little effort for Blue to do it. I offered to pay him $5.00 even.


Blue, strangely, did not agree with my arguments. He felt I needed to "be assertive" and "show that the sexes are equal" and "put on my big girl panties" and go up there and do it myself. I say the nice thing to do is be the hero and go up there for me, even if being assertive would be a character-building experience for me. I'd rather save assertiveness training for more important issues. So here it is folks, the first ever, You Decide Pink and Blue Pamphlet Poll: What should it be? Hubby the Hero or See Pink Turn Red? The end result is, of course, Blue got his way. I went up and got a fixed burrito. But I'd still like to know what the good readers think of the issue. Please vote via comments. And remember that I still have that five bucks.

Footnote: Little Blue gallantly offered to be my hero at dinner when Blue and I were joking about lunch. I love that little guy.

2 comments:

DaddyMan said...

Remember....I maintain some of your training records people.

Vote wisely. :) :P

(This commment was made by the disinformation committee of Project Mayham)

Degolar said...

A complex issue, and hard to vote. I can appreciate the arguments on both sides.

If you’re asking what I would actually do in that situation, I would probably go up and “do the dirty work.” But not so much because of the male-female thing, but because I have a tendency to help when asked. There may be some history between the two of you around this issue that would make Blue feel the need to take his stand, but I would have done it regardless of being asked by a male or female.

Now if you’re asking what I think about the issue itself, I think I have to side with Blue. If females want the privileges that come with being male, they have to be ready to accept the disadvantages that come along with them. The fact that the oppression in this instance is patriarchal is an indication that men have it better and the male advantages outweigh the disadvantages, but they exist. As far as your argument that a male complaining is perceived differently than a female, that is one of the ways that patriarchal oppression manifests. But the problem is not with the fact that you are female or the fact that you are demanding what you ordered, but the other person’s perception. You should not have to adjust yourself to his/her problem, and in fact should stand up to it if you want to change it.

And now I have to go have Taco Bell for lunch (hope they get my order right).