I Need a Hero

Today at lunch the Pamphlets met at Taco Bell to share a meal. I am one of those people who frequently custom-orders fast food, not because I'm uberpicky or anything, but for the simple reason that uncooked onions are gross and leave a terrible burpy aftertaste. So my burrito supreme is always ordered without onions. Only today it wasn't made correctly, and the onions were STILL THERE. Yuck! What to do? I really don't want to eat the onion burrito. I have an afternoon meeting in which I'll speak a lot in a small room. Onion breath is not a healthy part of that equation. It will definitely have to be returned to the counter and traded for a properly onionless version. This, I firmly believe, is best handled by Blue, for very good reasons.
Blue Takes It Back vs Pink Takes It Back

When a man takes an item back, it's because it's the restaurant's mistake. When a woman takes it back, she is bitchy and finicky.

Blue can shift attention from himself and thus feel no pressure. "My wife's burrito has onions. She wants a new one." If I go up there, it's all about me. "I really wanted one without onions. It's on the receipt... Can I have a new one.... please?"

It's romantically old-fashioned and even chivalrous for Blue to fix the burrito problem for me and swoop in on a white horse with a non-smelly burrito. It is icky and confrontational for me to go up there and complain about my food if the problem is not really a health or safety issue, but rather based only on my wants.

It takes little effort for Blue to do it. I offered to pay him $5.00 even.

Blue, strangely, did not agree with my arguments. He felt I needed to "be assertive" and "show that the sexes are equal" and "put on my big girl panties" and go up there and do it myself. I say the nice thing to do is be the hero and go up there for me, even if being assertive would be a character-building experience for me. I'd rather save assertiveness training for more important issues. So here it is folks, the first ever, You Decide Pink and Blue Pamphlet Poll: What should it be? Hubby the Hero or See Pink Turn Red? The end result is, of course, Blue got his way. I went up and got a fixed burrito. But I'd still like to know what the good readers think of the issue. Please vote via comments. And remember that I still have that five bucks.

Footnote: Little Blue gallantly offered to be my hero at dinner when Blue and I were joking about lunch. I love that little guy.

If nothing else, the internet has taught us how to self-obsess.

And yet still more getting to know me.


Four jobs you have had in your life:

1. Secretary
2. Sort and Count in a casino vault
3. Office Manager of a courier company
4. Accounting Assistant/Davis-Bacon, Section 3, and Minority Contracting Compliance specialist

Four movies you would watch over and over:

1. The Man From Snowy River
2. The Lord of the Rings trilogy
3. Finding Nemo over and over and over, because Little Blue loves it
4. The Incredibles, because I like it as much as Little Blue does.

Four places you have lived:

1. Willits, CA
2. Davis, CA
3. Independence, MO
4. Olathe, KS

4 TV shows you love to watch:

1. NCIS
2. House
3. Battlestar Galactica
4. Anything on FoodTV with Rachel Ray

4 places you have been on vacation:

1. Pismo Beach, CA
2. Willits, with a day in Fort Bragg
3. Laurie, at the Lake of the Ozarks
4. 28 states on any one of many family road trips

Four websites I visit daily:

1. For the past 2 days, and the next few, sportsline.com to look at how my brackets are doing.
2. google
3. gmail
4. bluepamphlet

Four of my favorite foods:

1. Italian
2. Chinese & Thai
3. Pizza
4. Mexican

Four places I would rather be right now:

1. Upstairs in bed sleeping through my tummyache
2. cuddled up with a good book and some hot chai
3. not thinking about going to work tomorrow
4. sitting on the couch with some jamocha almond fudge ice cream.